Episode 78

Episode 78 – How To Get Motivated


What you’ll learn in this episode:

Many people think that motivation is something that is bestowed on us. That either we wake up each day motivated, compelled by some external force, or we don’t. But I’m here to tell you that motivation is actually an inside game. And it’s something you can create and generate whenever you need it.

As business owners, there are a whole lot of things we need to do each day, and if we want to stay consistent and generate income and momentum in our businesses, we need to be able to know how to get motivated on demand.

In today’s episode I share how I create momentum in my business, and how I’ve coached hundreds of clients to do the same.

By the end of this episode, you will be able to look at your own motivation, determine what it feels like and how it shows, and use the tools that I share to create a plan to generate motivation for your business and your life on demand (I mean, what’s better than that?)!

Here’s a glance at this episode:

  • What motivation feels like to you, and how you can identify in your body when you’re motivated
  • Creating a go-to list of things that move you into the feeling of being motivated
  • Why accountability partners or a group of people can help you create and maintain your motivation
  • What are turtle steps, why they are essential actions to take to create motivation
  • Why you should stop asking yourself “why” you’re not motivated, and instead keep moving  

Mentioned in this episode:


Work/Connect with me:


Consults That Convert FREE Training

10K Accelerator

Magnetic Offers

[0:01] Well, hello, everyone, and welcome to the It’s Your Offer Podcast. I’m Jess Miller, and I’m so excited to be here today to talk to you about an important topic of how to get motivated. I don’t know about all of you, but this has been coming up quite a bit lately when I’ve been talking to clients or colleagues, and they’re struggling around finding their motivation or getting motivated every day.

[0:22] Let’s be honest, we don’t wake up motivated every day, do we? At least I don’t. And I know many of my clients don’t as well. And so the question of how do we get motivated? Or how do we find our motivation comes up quite a bit. And so as I’ve been talking about this, in the last couple of weeks, I started to think about, how do I get motivated? And how do I help my clients get motivated, because as entrepreneurs, we need to do things in our business every day. And some of those things are just not very motivating to us in that moment. But they’re crucial, and they have to happen. And then there are things that we actually really want to do, but sometimes we just don’t feel like doing it. But again, we’re business owners, we have to show up and do that.

[1:08] And so when I started to think about motivation, I actually thought about it related to my business first. But in reality, a lot of the behaviors that we create around our businesses are things that actually spill over to the rest of our lives, they spill over into our personal lives. And they really have a huge impact on just about everything that we do. So I started thinking about this. And I started thinking about this idea that the more motivation that you can create, or the more motivated you are, the more likely you are to create the results that you want to create, and to have the impact that you want to have. And the more fun you have doing it. Because we all know when we try to push this boulder uphill, and do something we really don’t want to do. In that headspace where we’re very demotivated, it feels twice as hard. And it’s a lot less fun. So I broke down, what are the things that I do to get motivated? And how can you get motivated right now, or to use these tools, when you’re not feeling motivated to do the things that you actually want to do. Because if you want to have a thriving business, as I mentioned earlier, you need to get out there and do things. And you need to be able to create motivation, and create momentum in your business so that you can have a big impact and create the results you want.

[2:31] So I’m going to walk through these things. And I want you to think about how these things apply to you. I want you to think about maybe something you’re not overly motivated to do. Or maybe it’s time recently that you haven’t been motivated. And I want you to think about these things in context to that, at the end of this episode, you’re going to be able to take these three or four things and go out and create your own motivation. And this is so powerful, because when we’re in that plays, when we’re in that flow, amazing things happen. And it’s really a great feeling and a great place to be.

[3:07] Okay, so the first thing that I do, when I want to create motivation, when I want to get motivated, is I do something that I know will put me in that frame of mind, or that vibe that I feel when I’m motivated. And just to sort of take a sidestep here, I think this is an important point just to point out when you’re motivated, you feel a certain way as a human being. This is personal to every different person, like when I’m motivated. I don’t necessarily feel in my body, the same thing that you might feel when you’re motivated. But I have a feeling in my body. And every person listening to this podcast, when they have been motivated to do something, when they have been aligned and excited, where there’s that compulsion to move forward and go take action, they have a certain feeling in their body. It is super important. And I actually should have put this as number one, I’m going to put it as number one. Now, it is super important that you know what that feeling is in your body.

[4:17] So I want you to take a minute, I want you to think about a time when you were motivated when you maybe sat down to do something, or you showed up someplace and you’re ready to take action. I want you to put yourself in that place. Or you could think about something you’re actually motivated to do going forward. So like maybe you have an event coming up and you’re so excited about speaking at it, or you are going to finally write that blog that you want to write, and you’re motivated to do that. I want you to think about it and I want you to hold it in your brain. And I want you to notice how it feels in your body. Okay, that feeling is the feeling that you get when you are like in motivation for lack of a better way to put it right when you’re motivated. It shows up in your body in the way that you feel right now, when you are thinking about something that you are motivated to do, or you’re thinking about something you’re motivated to do in the future, okay? Your body is a compass. And I used to joke that people need to feel forward. But this is what it means. It means that from a very practical perspective, when you are in alignment, when you are motivated, you have a physical sensation, that physical sensation is your body’s barometer of telling you, this is what it feels like when I’m motivated.

[5:34] This is what it feels like, when I take action, because we are emotional beings, and we generate action from the emotions that we feel. And those emotions come from what we are thinking about the thing that we’re going to do. So your body is a compass. And the feeling you have when you are motivated, feels like what you are feeling right now. Okay, so the first thing is you want to orient your body to that feeling, what does it feel like for you to be motivated? I know for me, it feels like I want to jump out of my chair, my body feels lighter. I feel like I have energy. I just there’s like this compulsion to move. And I know that that’s what I feel like when I’m motivated. So you determining how you feel is the first thing.

[6:23] The second step is doing something that gets you into that feeling. So going back to what I was saying earlier, we think that that feeling that motivation, is something that is bestowed on us from the universe, or God or somebody out there, some force out there, that is external to us. But I am here to offer you to say that motivation is created. It is created and you create it; it is an internal game. And so one of the fastest ways to get motivated, is to figure out what you can do, that’s going to create that feeling. And so for me personally, putting on music, moving my body, like walking, like being in that fast motion, brings a ton of motivation for me, my brain starts to work faster, I start to get all these ideas, the adrenaline kicks in, there’s all these endorphins. And I am like a motivated machine. Like if only I could do all of my work while I was going for a run. Or while I was even sometimes in my car, you know, the movement, even in my car, although I’m not like physically, my body isn’t moving, but I am moving in space sometimes brings all these ideas.

[7:41] So what is it for you? What is something that brings on that feeling that you get when you’re motivated? Because there’s no difference, your brain does not know the difference between I am putting on this music and my body feels like this. And so now I’m going to get all these ideas, or I’m in a state of motivation. And I My body feels like this, and I’m getting all these ideas, it doesn’t know the difference. So once it’s there, it’s going to take action in the same way. So you want to move yourself into that. So what is something that you can do that gets you motivated? And I really want you to think about this. For a long time. I didn’t know the answer to this, you know, people would say that they’re going to pump themselves up, or they’re going to say affirmations in front of the mirror. And I kind of thought they were nuts. It felt so contrived to me. Until I realized, actually, it’s not contrived, like I am moving myself into the space that I want to be in. So what is that thing that gets you motivated? What is that thing that creates that feeling in your body that you just experienced when we talked about that body compass. Okay, so that’s one of the things that you can do.

[8:53] Another thing that you can do is connect with other people pair up with others. We’ve heard this a million times, it’s in the research, we know this logically, that when we connect with others, we get more things done, we move into this space, where there’s this alignment with others, and we’re kind of all working toward the same goal or working towards something getting done. And we find that motivation to do it. We are motivated to show up with other people, we are motivated to get things done. And it’s very powerful. And so some of the things that you can consider that I’ve worked with, and I encourage a lot of my clients to do, especially my clients who are in my group programs, where there’s other people that they can connect with is to find an accountability partner as an example, you know, who can you run with? And I want to be very specific about this. You want to find somebody who’s going to help you get to your goals. You don’t want to pair up with somebody for the sake of pairing up with them, who’s going to drag you down.

[9:55] So if it’s somebody who has the same amount of desire, it’s someone Who can complement you, it’s someone who’s going to not take any of your crap. They’re not going to let you off the hook, you kind of want like a little bit of a mean accountability partner like a loving mean accountability partner, but you want someone who’s going to keep you on track, to show up and create the motivation to get the things done that you want. So an accountability partner is a great option.

[10:23] Something that I found recently that has really impacted my business and been super fun is something called Focus Mate. If you go to focusmate.com, you can sign up, they have a free account, they have a paid account, there’s a variety of different ways, but you can show up with focus mate. And what it does is it pairs you with a someone else to keep you accountable. So you basically go in, you put in the time that you’re available, you put in, you know how many slots you want, et cetera. And it will basically go out and find all the other people that are available at that time, it will pick someone, and it will pair you up with them. And then at that time, you get on the call, it’s a Zoom meeting, and you tell the other person, you know what you’re going to be doing, and then hour and or half hour or however long you choose. And then at the end, you connect back to let them know how it went in what you got done and that sort of thing. It’s really powerful, because it’s automatic, it’s easy. And you know, somebody’s waiting for you there. So you’re much more apt to show up, kind of commandeer that time, and get yourself into that motivated state to get things done. So it’s kind of the electronic version of an accountability partner. So if you don’t know someone, there are literally 1000s of people out there waiting for you at Focus mate on the internet somewhere that could pair you up. And it’s the same kind of a relationship.

[11:46] And I will tell you, there people that are on that are serious, they’re serious about getting things done, they’re serious about finding their motivation. And it’s a great way to really protect that time for you. Because for many of us, we, you know, schedule other things over. But knowing you need to get something done, wanting to create that motivation, finding someone to create it with you, it’s a great tool for that. So I highly recommend you check it out.

[12:09] The next thing is taking the tiniest, tiniest step of action. Martha Beck, who I trained with, used to call this a Turtle Step. And what she would say was, what is the simplest, easiest thing, almost like a no- brainer that you could do, that’s going to move you closer to getting the thing done that you want to get done. And I have found in my work, that we think that action comes after a motivation. But often, it’s just taking the action, that creates more motivation. So even when you are stepping into doing something that gets you motivated, like we were talking about earlier, the action of stepping into trying to create that motivation is an action.

[13:00] So when there is something that we don’t feel motivated around doing, one way to really move us into that space to get motivated, is to take action. And once we take the action, the motivation, and the momentum that we create from the action starts to compound on itself. And it creates more motivation and more momentum. And before we know it, we’re just cruising. Have you ever had this experience? I know I have. It’s like, oh, my goodness, what took me so long to just get this thing started. Now that I’m doing it, it’s taking five minutes, and it’s no big deal. It’s like there’s all this anticipatory anxiety in front of just getting started. And we feel like we’re not motivated at all that anxiety sort of kind of demotivates us.

[13:45] So what is the tiniest turtle step that you can take to move you into this momentum and this motivation that you want to be creating, so that you can take more action, let’s pretend you had to write an email to your boss about a project that you were working on and you didn’t want to you’re hedging around doing that it was uncomfortable, maybe it wasn’t going as well as you thought. And, you know, here you are needing to write this email or, you know, something’s happening with one of your clients. And you need to give them some feedback. And you’re, you know, you don’t want to send that email, or you don’t want to send that message. A turtle step that you could take around either of those examples is to literally just open your email account and write Dear so and so. Like that is it just that little step that starts those wheels turning?

[14:45] It’s like okay, now I’m into the email and I’m sitting here, and I’ve got dear Suzy and am I compelled to now do something more. But even the small act of just opening your email and writing dear so and so. is a big step. I mean, it’s a small step in the sense that it’s a turtle step, but it’s a big step that it’s getting you closer to where you want to go. And then from there, like, what would you write on just the first line? And you could kind of turtle step your way into this motivation. And if any of you have ever experienced this before, I know I have, I’m like, Dear So and So, and then, okay, what do I want to say first? And then I start like writing that. And then okay, what’s the second sentence and like, before you know it, it just kind of starts pouring out of you. And you have a first draft, it’s already done. So the tiniest tiniest turtle steps can be huge when it comes to creating motivation to finding that motivation and knowing how to get motivated.

[15:47] And then last, but not least, I find this is actually one of the most important steps when it comes to motivation. And that is stopping, asking yourself, why you’re not motivated. I know that sounds completely counterintuitive, because most people will coach you and say, well, why don’t you want to do this? Right? Well, we very much focus on the why we’re not motivated. But in my experience, you know exactly why you’re not motivated. Right? Either there’s fear, maybe there’s fear of failure, there’s fear of doing it wrong, there’s fear of looking stupid, you’re tired, you’d rather be watching Netflix. When it comes down to why you’re not doing something, it’s pretty clear. But we have this tendency to stay in this place where we constantly ask ourselves why. And we spend more time trying to unearth some deeper meaning of why, or telling ourselves that we don’t know why. That it keeps us stuck, right where we are.

[16:57] So my offer to you is asking yourself, why you don’t want to do something, is probably one of the worst questions that you can constantly be asking yourself, if you want to get motivated. You can ask yourself at once, you can come up with an answer once. And then it’s time to figure out how do I get motivated? Not why am I not motivated? Because all of those reasons I just said, right, you’re afraid you don’t want to fail. You don’t want to do it wrong. You don’t want to look stupid, it’s hard. It’s not that fun. All those reasons are valid reasons. And they’re all the reasons you’re stuck. And when we’re focused on that, guess what, we don’t create motivation. So stop asking yourself, why? Stop telling yourself you don’t know. Because both of those things are not true. And start getting into how to get motivated, using some of these other tools to get you into motivation. The faster that you move out of that place of why why why why why, the faster you will start finding your motivation, getting motivated and getting a lot of things done.

[18:14] Okay, so to recap, one, identify what motivation feels like in your body. When you are motivated, you have a physical sensation, your body is a compass, use it to direct you to where you want to go to move into that motivation. Every person has a different feeling. It’s your barometer. So figure out what that is.

[18:36] Number two, figure out what you need to do to produce that feeling in your body what you need to think and do to produce that feeling. So what gets you into that motivated state? Is it listening to music? Is it walking? Is it chatting with a friend? Is it reading something inspirational? Is it looking for beautiful photos? Is it reading testimonials from your favorite clients? Whatever it is, figure out what gets you into that motivated place. And how do you know when you’re there, it feels in your body, like it feel felt when you were looking at your body compass and you were feeling that sensation when you’re in motivation.

[19:13] The third thing is consider pairing up with others who are going to help you move into that motivated state and get closer to your goals. Accountability buddies are awesome. Check out focusmate.com if you don’t have somebody that can help you sort of commandeer that time and help you move toward your goals together is powerful. And we keep people in that place. And it’s really, really cool to have and more fun, obviously to work with other people.

[19:40] And then take even the tiniest action to move you toward your goal. We use the example of you have to write an email you don’t want to write just open that email and just write Dear so and so you don’t even need to do anything more. Just start with that. You know what comes up after that. What are you compelled to do? What feels like that tiny turtle step that’s going to just move you into action, taking action and creating that motivation?

[20:07] And then last but not least, stop asking yourself why you’re not motivated. It doesn’t matter, it actually doesn’t matter. And telling yourself you don’t know, is even worse. And it’s not true. You don’t want to be asking yourself why you actually just want to move into how do I get motivated, you know, you’re not motivated right now. There’s nothing more to learn. And then it’s time to just move into this other place where you’re starting to create that motivation. From a place of motivation, you’re going to create so many things and create such powerful results, you won’t know what hit you. And like I said, we think of motivation as this elusive thing. But I’m here to tell you, it is an inside game, you can create, you can literally go through every day, motivated to do what it is you want to do. But it starts with believing that you create it, having the tools in your tool bag to move you into that space when you need it. And then committing to doing that every day. It’s literally like rinse, repeat, repeat.

[21:22] And I remember actually an episode it was a podcast or something where they were talking to Oprah. And they asked her like, how do you wake up every day and do this? How do you get yourself excited to do this, and she said, I commit to it every day. And that’s really what it is. Motivation is a choice. And a choice that you make toward the things you want to create, the success you want to create, the impact you want to create. And for every single person listening to this podcast, you got this, you can do this, you can move yourself into motivation. And now you know exactly how to get motivated so that you can wake up every day, and create the day that you want to create.

[22:05] So we would love to hear from you about how you are getting motivated each day. So many incredible ideas come from our community. We love touching our listeners. So if you have done something that has really created motivation for you that has helped you get into that place of being motivated, we want to hear it. So send us a message at support@JessicaMillerCoaching.com so we can hear from you, celebrate you and really share the love with everyone around these great ideas that are keeping people motivated and letting them create their results in their business in their life every day.